Classroom Commentary

Currently, I am sitting at my desk watching Landon present his AP Psych movie. He doesn't seem very enthused about it. I'm glad that I was able to watch What About Bob? That was a good movie. My presentation ran very short. I hope that I don't get docked points. The thing is that I can't judge a quick presentation very well. I heard three minutes and thought that I needed to rush through shit and be really brief. Fuck. All of these presentations are way longer than mine, I really hope I don't get docked now. Okay, I don't intend this to be mean but this girl has a really bland voice. It's kind of miserable to listen to and I hope that somebody with more voice inflection goes next to balance this shit out. So I was walking in with Gibbs today and he was acting more normal than I was. Maybe it's because I dominated the conversation and maybe it was because I've only had three or four hours of sleep in the last two to three days. Okay seriously how long is she going to present for, these people are making me look like a ditz. A downright ditz. Dag, yo, this is a really horrible blog post. Actually I haven't had a completely worthless post this month or actually trimester so, ya know what, I think I deserve one and what better timing than for my 27th blog. Okay for real this presentation is going way too long but on the bright side maybe Mrs. Melone will appreciate the fact that I got to the point. Echhh, I just want an A-. Hopefully this project bumps me up. If not, who the hell cares. It's over, YAY:) Alright let's see who our next victim is. Alright thats mean, I'm not picking on anybody but this next girl's voice is not much more enthusiastic than the first, although it is better. HAHAHAHA the grampa in her movie was addicted to meth and committed suicide. That's fucking great. Grampa doin' meth. Who the hell ever decides that meth is a good life choice? Stupid people that's who. Let's do a quick word check. Alright, just under four hundred. So this girl's presentation is on Stranger Than Fiction. I remember going to see that for Alosha's birthday party. I had to sit on the floor and drink a blue slushy. I was really sore afterward. I think that put a damper on the mood because the second time I watched it in my bedroom I enjoyed it a whole lot more. Although it makes no difference to you, I just took about an hour break from writing because my teacher had me put the laptop away and I took a final in my 2nd hour. Welp, I'm outa here.

guitar bro

I've been somewhat musically inclined for most of my life. Although that statement sounds very uncertain, it holds true for me. I wouldn't imagine that I make myself out to be some musical prodigy or virtuoso but I do have some talent in that area. When I was about six years old I learned how to play the piano. I was taught to sight read and I got progressively better at it, as I do with most things that I practice for a number of years, but that fell out when I quit lessons sometime in middle school. However, when I got to middle school, after a brief and futile effort attempting to play trombone in the band, I took vocal music, or choir, and participated in show choir. I did well in both of those but quit show choir my eight grade year and stopped singing in high school when it was no longer required. So here I stand, today, with a new guitar and ukulele and the desire to master at least one of the two by the time summer comes to an end.

So, my inspiration for this random surge of musical motivation, or whatever the hell we can call it, has really stemmed from the ukulele my aunt and uncle bought me for my birthday. It was a kind of random gift and they went out on a limb hoping that I would like it. Well, the limb held and I loved it. Immediately I took it home and YouTube searched "how to play somewhere over the rainbow on ukulele" and within a half hour I had that down. Ukulele is pretty darn easy instrument to play because there are only four strings and almost every song is the same basic chords, with a little variation in strum pattern here and there.

After I had realized how easy the ukulele was, I decided to move on to the guitar. Now, a few years back, on another birthday, perhaps my eighth, I had received an acoustic guitar from my great-step-grandfather twice removed and three times divorced (I really don't know how to explain my relation to him but nevertheless it's a complicated one). The guitar was nothing over the top, just a relatively cheap, beginners guitar and a few picks. After locating it, I picked it up and YouTube searched "how to play casimir paluski day on guitar." A beautiful songs that, as it turns out, isn't too complicated to play. No bar chords, just a D, C, Am, and G with a few hammer ons and pull offs. Regardless, I ended up wasting around five hours playing guitar that night instead of studying.

I don't have motivation to play guitar/ukulele for any other reason except for the fact that it is just god damn addictive. I mean seriously, every time I sit down to play, I can't stop! I think it's because I love music so much that being able to play it myself just gives me this incredible rush that I can't explain. Maybe not a rush, but there's this feeling of euphoria that I get when I'm able to strum out a song that I've loved forever and am now just being able to play.

TEACHERZ, Y U NO GIVE US A BREAK??!?!!

This is a rant blog. It's not too often that I complain, but when I do it seems like I tend to express it through a blog in one way or another. Today I will, once again, be complaining about school. It happens that every year, in varying levels of magnitude, I become overwhelmed with end-of-the-year projects. Some I am aware of months, even trimesters, ahead of time and others I am given only a few weeks to prepare for. Regardless the amount of time I am given, they are always all done the night/nights before they are due. I don't really know how legitimate my argument is, odds are that it's not very, but I would like to throw a fit anyways because it's something to do.

As this school year winds down, I watch my senior friends finish their last days at Kennedy and try to enjoy the end of my time here as a junior. Unfortunately, all of these damn end of the year projects keep on getting in the way of my enjoyment. There's just no end to them!! With a final project and presentation and movie poster board due in AP Psychology, a final presentation over the Beatles in U.S. History, a portfolio and radio essay due in AP Language and Composition, and an oral final to present in Spanish III there are just too many damn things to do! I tell you, there is hardly any learning to be had with any of these projects. What they all really amount to is a "culmination" of our learning. Honestly, the teachers just want you to realize all that you've learned so that you look at this project and then look back on the year and say, "Hey, check out all the things I know!" Don't get me wrong, it's great and all to see what you've accomplished but when all of your teachers decide to assign projects at the same time, instead of coming up with one fabulous essay/project/presentation all of them get rushed and jumbled and come out either half assed or thrown together at the last minute. Fortunately, I believe mine to have survived the toil that can often ruin some final projects, although, coincidentally, since I am writing my AP Lang blog, my radio essay may be a little raunchy for a school project because Andrew and I got lazy and basically said, "Fuck it." We improved a lot of our radio essay, which isn't to say that it wasn't good because we did know what we were doing and the type of person we were trying to portray, it's just that we didn't care to sensor ourselves at all and I may have mentioned swinging my dick around at one point.

I may have gotten off track a little, but the point remains that if our teachers are to schedule final projects, they need to be conscientious of the fact that every other teacher is doing the same thing at the same time. Whether this means smaller projects or staggered due dates, I don't know, but something needs to be done because summer is coming up faster and faster and we are loosing the attention span of many at a rate exponential to that of the days remaining before summer is officially here.

Shitty Motions to Other Drivers

So, I'm heading out of AP exams and the whole place is congested beyond belief (with traffic). A couple hundred students all just exited the same building at the same time and inevitably there is a huge cluster-fuck of cars out in the parking lot. Attempting to exit this massive jam, I am constantly giving the right of way and accepting it from other drivers. That experience brought to light something that I had never really thought about or really had to deal with much before. That thing, or rather action, is the act of motioning to other drivers. Whether it be giving them the right of way or... okay that's the only one I can think of but it's also by far the most common. What I had never realized was how much of a dick I looked like giving people the right of way. It could have been because I was restless but people kept on giving me this look like "SORRY SORRY SORRY, I'll get out of your way!!" or "Oh, thank you Lord Heskje for allowing me to pass by your highness." I really felt awful, but I didn't even mean to give off such a negative vibe!

Maybe I can explain what I was doing. So, when I imagine giving someone the right of way, I think of it as you kind of scooting them along like "there ya go, bud. Keeeeeep goin'." So I lift up my hand and do just a couple short, staccato movements like I'm nudging them, you know? That's something that I don't think anybody has a problem with but where I believe my problem lies is at the point that my facial expression doesn't change. I can do the nicest gesture in the world but with that plain Jane, monotone expression (what I imagine myself having while I drive because driving is no trip *pun intended*) it'll come off real snotty.

I think that for future reference, if I can remember to change my expression, I'll be golden. Although, with this new addition, there will be a probational period and some experimentation so that I can see which face will work the best and give off the attitude and persona that I would like. You see, if I smile too much it looks like I'm trying too hard and I'll end up with a situation more awkward than when I was straight faced where as the straight face look pisses people off. Somewhere in the middle, with a little smile and a touch of urgency, I believe that my future driver to driver encounters will vastly improve.

Summertime Ambitions Part 3

Lastly, I want this summer to be the summer of love. No, I don't want to have tons of premarital sex with anonymous partners, but I would like to spend as much time as I can with my friends. There are tons of things that I want to do with my friends, but it is all, for the most part, centered around the core group of improvers (plus Mohammad) that I'd like to spend time with.

Branching off of this final subcategory, I'd like to introduce the improv bonfire. I will make these subcategories short, sweet and to the point so basically we have had either one or two improv bonfires so far and both, or just the one, have/has been fantastic. We had the fire pit where we all talked and then went inside to eat, converse, play some hide and go seek and just have a jolly old time. I want to have more of these so that I can continue fostering my friendships and to hopefully spend as much time with Shane as I can before he goes to Iowa (the University of, we're already in the state).

Road trips. I think a couple of road trips sound like a solid plan for the summer. I don't know where I'd go, although Mohammad has suggested some eateries outside of Cedar Rapids that sound phenomenal, but road trips are the perfect summertime activity. Just for a day, to hop in the van with a couple of pals and just drive sounds fun even excluding our potential destination. Popeye's chicken is definitely on the list but I'll have to work on this summer's road trip plan further.

Neo-Hippie movement. Not sure if I already posted this or if it's still a draft but I'll briefly touch on it anyways. Basically I want to lay in a field with my friends, or a lady friend, and listen to music. that's it. Sounds pretty rad, am I right? This summer I really want to take time to relax and enjoy life which is why I've actually even considered meditation as a goal this summer, but we'll see where I go with that.

Through whatever activity it is that I'm doing this summer, I want to be doing it with a friend or friends. I've realized that they are the most important part of high school and one of the most central parts of life and I would have it no other way than to spend time with them. I aspire to come out of this summer, into my senior year, with the best group of pals that any Jack or Jill on the block would be jealous of.

Summertime Ambitions Part 2

Moving on from my manly, wood shop ambitions, let's talk about something less masculine. And that thing is reading. Okay, I don't want to put a bad light on reading, but it's not necessarily macho. In fact, I would say it's simply a gender neutral scholarly pursuit. Now that we've got all the politics out of the way, I'd like to discuss what I want to read and why. Just recently I started reading due to a couple reasons. One is that I need to as a requirement for AP Lang and the other was that it was nice outside and I needed a book to help me enjoy the weather. So I took that advice of a friend and picked out a book by Kurt Vonnegut. The book was "A Man Without A Country" which turns out to be one of his last works. A compilation of his essays, "A Man Without A Country" is full of these wonderful writings that incorporate his contemporary ideas with a very old fashioned diction. One of my favorite quotes from the book is as follows: "I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different." That statement was the driving point of a little anecdote about going to the post office rather than sending an email. Vonnegut has this hilarious way of saying everything, even his most liberal agendas, in the most old-fashioned tone. He sounds like an angry old man, which is entertaining in itself, and because of his subject matter the writing is even more enjoyable. Sorry that I went on for so long about Vonnegut but he really is great and I highly recommend him. Anywho, I realized when I was reading that good books are actually worth reading. Taking Vonnegut as an example one last time, his book was actually engaging and fun to read and because of that I forgot that I was technically still reading for school. I think it's because we are so often "required" or "forced" to read by our teachers that we loose interest in it and deem reading as just another thing we have to do for academics and forget that it can actually be enjoyable. I'm not going to say that I love reading everything because reading Great Expectations was easily the most miserable experience of my life. It was fucking awful. But, I'm now trying to find good authors and interesting subjects to read about so that I can enjoy reading once again and maybe learn something over this summer (forgot we were still on that subject, didn't you?).

Looks like we'll need another post to finish this one up, see ya next time!

Summertime Ambitions Part 1

In the summer time, when the weather is high

You can stretch right up and touch the sky

When the weather's fine

You got women, you got women on your mind

Have a drink, have a drive

Go out and see what you can find

Those are lyrics from the song "In The Summertime" by Mungo Jerry. A fantastic song that has gotten me in the mood for summer. No school, few responsibilities, and plenty of time to do what ever the hell I want. Being an American teenager between the months of June and August has to be the epitome of freedom. There's hardly a thing I can't do and I have a good deal of things that I'd like to... do. Let's talk about 'em!

Well for one, I'd like to learn how to play guitar, ukulele, and whatever instrument that catches my eye. I already have a blog about playing the guitar or ukulele, or at least I have a draft about it that I'm going to post, so I won't cover that in this post. However, a good friend of mine, Jack, and I have a couple of musical ambitions for the summer that we're planning on pursuing. We want to build a couple instruments of our own. One, Jack's idea, is the cajon. From my understanding, a cajon is a percussion instrument composed of a wooden box used to make different beats and/or sounds. The other, my contribution, is a cigar-box guitar. It's basically a guitar made from a cigar box that you attach a neck and strings to. How fucking awesome is that. I'm sorry, but this shit excites me. Apparently, people in the south are known for having done this as it shows up in a lot of blues and country, or so I believe. Anyway, we're planning on building our instruments in the wood shop of a neighbor and close friend to my aunt and uncle. For the cajons specifically, we're thinking about asking my aunt, who's a great artist, to possibly paint the wood with some kind of design. We'll have to look into the benefits of a paint job because I suspect that it's better for the sound to leave the wood natural so the vibrations are more free and can resound better. It sounds like a fun project and something out of the ordinary because I haven't heard of many teenagers building their own instruments on their free time in the summer. Great, now that I have unnecessarily recapped this whole paragraph I'm going to stop this paragraph. I'm one redundant son of a bitch.

I see now that I have quite a bit to say about my summer so I will be making this a mini blog series of sorts. Stay tuned for more things I'd like to do this summer!

Taking the ACT

To begin with, I registered for the April 14th ACT and then I gone done took it. The results just came back and I'm pretty satisfied with my score. My strategy for the ACT is to take it a minimum of two times and the first time I wanted to take it without studying so that I could see what I needed to work on and give myself a good base. So my first score was a 32 and I think that's a great place to start. Some of my friends give me shit for wanting to take it again, but honestly, if I got a 32 the first time with no preparation, imagine what I could get with a little studying on the areas that I most need it.

So, I've found that it's really hard not to sound like a douche when telling people that I got a 32. Even writing that last sentence makes me sound like a douche so you can see how to perpetual douche cycle can keep on going. I started off telling people like it was NBD and that was clearly the wrong way to go about it. I don't know that people really thought I was a douche but they were definitely way too impressed. So now I just down play it if it ever comes up in conversation, which I try to avoid in the first place. Instead of saying it like a fact, I make it seem like I'm not even sure if that was what I got by trailing off like, "Thirty twwooo...??.." If you know what I mean.

To sum this up and re-instill the belief that I'm a tool, the ACT really isn't all that hard. For the English section, if you know what a normal sentence should sound like, you can do pretty well. For the math section... well you just have to be kinda good at math. There's really no other way around that one. As for reading, time is everything. It isn't overly hard but it was my lowest score, a 30, because I was rushing to get done. Although, I do have to say, after taking my AP Lang exam, I have found that drinking coffee is a really good way to make my brain work faster. I suggest you drink some before the ACT. Science is kind of a bitch all around. Somehow I still did pretty well on it, but I think the best way to improve your score is to just plain get used to it. It takes a long time due to the fact that every problem requires a certain amount of decoding so that you can understand what, exactly, it is asking. I don't even think that it takes a whole lot of intelligence to do well on the ACT, a good memory will serve you just as well if you can remember all the shit they taught you in school.

May Day

It's kind of funny to think that May Day, a holiday where people seemingly arbitrarily hand out cups of candy to their neighbors out of the kindness of their hearts, has such strong ties to communism. This May Day, myself and two friends put together twenty some May Day baskets for our friends, ourselves and our mothers. It started with Mohammad tweeting out and asking if anybody wanted some and after several people requested them we got together and decided to do this thing for real. The best thing about it was just the feeling that I was doing this small, kind gesture for people that I didn't really even know (most of our recipients were friends of Mohammad that I had absolutely no relations with). It made me want to do this sort of thing all the time, just nice little gestures and such.

I should probably discuss our selection process for the May Day baskets. It was actually a half hour long process with lots of decisions to be made. We made it clear that we wanted a good balance of sweet and savory in our baskets and so there was much deliberation between which candies to choose. We knew that we needed two fruit based candies and two chocolates. After some thought, we decided to go with Lifesavers gummies and Starbursts for our fruit flavored candies. A large bag of chocolate stars would compensate for the lack a diversity in the chocolate spectrum. Now we needed a filler. Something to take up the majority of the volume of our May Day baskets because a basket with sheer candy is just too expensive to provide. For the filler, we chose Chex Mix. We bought two bags just to be safe, and mixed all of the ingredients together. We thought that Chex Mix would be a good change of pace filler because most May Day baskets have popcorn which is really boring and expected in May Day baskets. I believe that our choice of Chex Mix was superior because it was not only more diversified but it is a universally known fact that Chex Mix is in every way possible more delicious than popcorn.

When we were all done with our baskets, we gave them to Mohammad so that he could pass them out the next day at school. In the end, they were a hit. Everybody loved them and I think it was our conscientious decision making process that really made the difference between our baskets and your every-day, run-of-the-mill popcorn-filled May Day disgraces. I plan on participating in May Day for many years to come because making the baskets and handing them out are equally as fun and rewarding.

How many glory holes are there in Cedar Rapids bookstores?

Okay, so like the last few days in AP Psych I've really had nothing to do but dick around on the laptops or in the computer labs. We've been done with our real work now for a while in that class and because I have the internet on my hands I am beginning to find that on the internet there are some strange people. So, my friend Ali and I are surfing the web, looking at clothes we want to buy in the summer, checking twitter and doing other typical teenage web behaviors. Then, I notice Ali is on Craigslist looking for a cat (she's a bit obsessed with the feline race) and I begin reading one of the posts. She explains to me that there is an individual who is willing to meet up in the Kingston parking lot and give her a kitten for free. She wants to know if I would accompany her, along with her boyfriend, as moral support/bodyguards. A scary idea I immediately shut it down but laugh at the weirdos that must be constantly roaming these Craigslist forums. Ali now takes me to the epicenter of all internet creeps, loners, weirdos, and pervs: the missed connections and casual encounters Craigslist forums.

We first headed to missed connections. While creepy, desperate, and often times weird, these were pretty tame compared to what we found later. A lot of these men and occasionally women were lonely and it was pretty apparent through their writing. They tended to sensationalize brief encounters with other men and women in a way that was really disturbing. Having said that I didn't even know that this section was only scratching the surface of how truly fucked up people can be. There was one particularly funny story about a man who met a women in Hallmark at the mall and helped her pick out candles. At one point he wrote about staring at her chest until he was "... busted." The more detail these went into the funnier they got and my creepy pedofile voice certainly helped add to the mood. What came next was far worse.

After laughing at these for some time we thought, "What could be funnier that lonely people hopelessly posting on the internet to find a person they had only met for a short while?" Clearly the answer was lonely people trying to find other equally lonely people that they had absolutely no connection to. So, we take a trip over to the casual encounters category and what we saw was just plain fucked up. Here's a sample post, directly from the casual encounters section of the Cedar Rapids Craigslist:

"Wife is out with friends and its time to give into my fantasy. I want a smaller hard cock in my ass for the FIRST time. My wife has used a strap-on but I want to take a load in my virgin ass. I would like a face pic so I make sure I don't know you or work with you, discretion is a must! I will send face pus in return. I am a taller gentleman so here is your chance short guys, give it to me hard!"


Honestly, I can't tell if these are real or if they are written sarcastically but there are far too many of them and a whole lot of them provide a phone number or some medium of contact that there are some real ones out there. A commonality that I found amongst a few of these was that there are a lot of encounters in book stores of all places! Whether it be a missed connection between two homosexual men or a longing to hook up at a glory hole, the creepy Craigslist community loves the bookstores. 

I feel as though I have spent far too long talking about such a disgusting topic and so I just wanna end it. The bottom line is stay off Craigslist and away from bathrooms in bookstores.

Song Review: Karate

The other day I was hanging out with the improv team, we were actually driving to a performance by a New York Improv troupe, when several people in the back seat began requesting this song. I had half-ass listened to it before with Alosha, but I just blew it off because, honestly, I've grown a little wary of Alosha's music choice as of late, but that's aside the point. We started playing this really funky, catchy tune and maybe it was because it was dusk and I was driving but it just hit me. THIS SONG IS AMAZING. It's like some kind of neo-disco-elctro-funky groove that is just so addictive I find myself setting it on repeat when I drive around. Why don't I let you guys take a gander and then we'll discuss it some more:

Pretty great, am I right? The lyricism takes you straight back to the 70's club scene; drugs, drinks, fast paced and sexual undertones all are reminiscent of the lifestyle. The beat is totally 100% funk. The distortion and staccato give it that fun and hip rhythm that makes it such an enjoyable tune. As I've mentioned, I love listening to this song in particular when I'm driving. Maybe it's the lyric "I drive like a gangster when I'm comin' to see you" or maybe it's something different entirely but I freaking love it. Because it's such an upbeat song, I recommend turning this up and rolling the windows down the next time you take a drive.

My favorite lyrics would have to be "These hands are deadly guns from smokin', drinkin', bein' a thug." I won't condone any of these behaviors, of course, because I am a model student and citizen who upholds only the strictest moral code, but they sure do add to the mood of the song. It's a really cool metaphor used and it really makes me envision this whole 70's swinging club scene. That being said, my favorite part of the whole song, and this is just a little peculiarity that I have, is when he says "And I'm comin' to see you all the time." It's not even so much the lyricism at this point as it is his delivery. I can honestly not put into words why I like this part so much because I really don't even know why. It just comes down to the way he says it over the beat and kind of cascades down in pitch, I don't know. Just listen closely if you choose to play this again and I'm sure you'll here the sort of thing I'm referring to.

In all, I wish that I knew of more quality music with this kind of disco and funk influence because I would listen to it all the time in the summer. It's perfect for those fun-loving sunny days with friends when there isn't a care in the world. My rating? 8.5/10

Shufflemania 2!!!?

The first song that I chose, at random, was Somewhere Over the Rainbow by The Blanks. The Blanks are actually the a capella band from Scrubs but they actually make their own music and do covers like this one. The only instrument in this song is the ukulele, a wonder choice. Ted, his Scrubs name because I don't know what his real name is, sings lead vocals and the other three members sing back up vocals and harmonize very nicely. It's a great song to listen to on those chill summer days when the world slows down and there's nothing to do. Tell Me Baby by The Red Hot Chili Peppers is probably a song much more familiar to a lot of you. It's a pretty typical RHCP tune, up beat, slappin' bass and just a touch of mainstream so as to attract the masses. This song is only okay for me though because, personally, I think the Chili Peppers got worse with time. I still like the Peppers from the 90's above any of their more recent recordings and it looks like it will stay that way. Oh, rap! I kind of forgot about a lot of the rap that was on my iPod. I'm So Raw by Tyga is from a mix tape I downloaded off of hotnewhiphop or datpiff. It's a shitty song, but I have moments where I come back to rap so I just like to keep it on hand if ever I get into that mood again. My falling out with rap can most likely be attributed to it's overwhelming aggressive tone. To be honest, I didn't even know that I had this next song, Stand By Me by Marvin Gaye. I love Marvin Gaye and soul music as a whole, so this is a pleasant surprise. Sometimes it's good to listen to classics because a lot of the music today, even all my hipster shit, has been so heavily influenced by the classics that it is good to see where the styles we see today have come from. Stand By Me has a really very beautiful string orchestra playing in the background, probably just a few instruments, but it adds a nice elegant and peaceful touch to the song. Union Chapel Day is a song entirely done by synth. I have never listened to it and it's only a minute long, but it sure is pleasant. Alosha gave me this song along with his Hefner collection so I may have to check more of this stuff out. Well it looks like that's it for Shufflemania 1!!! We'll be back with you sometime in the future when I run low on blog ideas!

Fame Bloggity Blog

Drama has been a new experience for me this year and I've loved every moment of it. Up to this point, speech has been my only exposure to drama and even solely through that my appreciation for it has grown exponentially. The one act play I was apart of was phenomenal and if it weren't for a weak state performance, I'm almost positive it would have performing all-stated. Improv I couldn't be more ecstatic about, winning the banner with Shane and Andrew was an experience I'll remember for as long as I live. After figuring out that I'm not horrible at this sort of thing, I decided to push my luck and try out for a play. Well turns out I made that too. Its my first play and I'm nervous of course, but more than than I'm exited. For Kennedy's spring musical we are doing FAME and I've been cast as one of the male leads! It should turn out to be a darn good show and I'll tell you why:

I'll admit, the first few weeks of FAME practices didn't go very well at all. Vocals-wise our voice coach or vocal director, Ellen, had some form of cancer and was canceling on us due to her illness. As for the dancing, it was tough, I mean really tough. I had never been in a musical of course and the only show choir I had done was in 6th and 7th grade so I had no real foundation for this kind of thing. Even from those who were in show choir and had done previous musicals, they say that the dancing was extraordinarily difficult this time around. After those first few weeks I wasn't so sure this musical was shaping up to be anything great.

Let's skip ahead a little while and now were only a couple weeks out from the show we've gotten the old vocal director at Harding Middle School, who is currently working at Franklin but most of us know her from Harding, to fill Ellen's role. We reworked several of the songs and now, with the band, just ran it over and over until we synced up perfectly. Oh, I also should mention that the music that the band was given and our vocals did not match up because one was the original Broadway edition and one was an adaptation to the script. Regardless, we powered through those challenges and worked out the kinks as they appeared. As for the dancing, we had some excellent leadership come through by seniors who knew it well enough to re-teach it to the whole cast so that we could feel confident coming into the final practices. Acting was never really a problem because our director was one of the few things we had as a constant in the whole production.

It sounds like at this point I'm ripping pretty hard on FAME, but really I'm not. I'm just giving a realistic portrayal of what it has been like, and, honestly, some people have far worse to say. At this point, I am incredibly optimistic, though. I can finally see the show coming together and it's turning out to be something pretty special. All of these pieces that we have been working with are finally meshing and fitting very well with one another. All aspects of the show are looking great and the set, thanks to Tolly,  the techies and many other helping hands, is AMAZING. Everybody needs to come see FAME on one of it's four runs April 19-21. See you there!

Neo-Hippie Movement

Finally now, at this point in high school, I think I have found my niche. I've really enjoyed being in drama and speech, mainly because of improv, and in improv mainly because of my friends. I've known most of them since elementary school and the friends I haven't known for as long, don't even feel that way. It's the best thing that has happened to me outside of being born and I couldn't be more thankful. Now, coming into the summer with this fantastic group of people I've surrounded myself with, I would like to announce a new movement that a fellow member and I have started here in Cedar Rapids and that is the Neo-Hippie movement.

You know, I've always had a respect for the whole hippie movement and transcendentalist thought. I completely agree with the whole mantra of tune in, turn on, and drop out. Okay, maybe not the drop out but the first two definitely. But I just feel like life is too much stress lately and this summer I plan to reverse that. My first step is definitely going to be starting this Neo-Hippie movement. I'll need to buy some hippie garb so that I look the part but 90% is really just attitude. If I can just completely let all of my responsibilities slide, then I'll be in perfect shape to start acting like a hippie. Also I need a few friends to hippie it up with me because you never see a lonely hippie, never. That's probably one of the better things they have going for them is spending time with friends. Hippie vans are always full and they always seem to have the best time. One aspect that I will not let slide, though, is cleanliness. I will not parade around in my ball gravy all summer long so showers are going to have to remain a staple in my day to day routine. Plus, I don't think that a whole lot of hippies had to endure the muggy summers here in Iowa too often. Yea, I'm definitely staying clean. Let's see what else is there about being a hippie that I like... OH! The music! That was one of the main components of my whole Neo-Hippie plan. I want to hang out with friends and lay in a field all the time. That sounds great, doesn't it? Maybe I could make a picnic out of it, although that doesn't seem entirely like hippie behavior but if I'm breaking the shower rule I might as well break a few more.

Netflix

With summer comes a ton of free time. Even though I would like to be productive this summer, I still think that there will be plenty of lazy afternoons and chill nights that I'll be taking advantage of my Netflix subscription. Last summer, it was That 70's Show and Scrubs that dominated my summer. Now that it's that time again, I feel like I need a new couple of series to help me fight the boredom.

A series of series that I have considered is Star Trek. Star Trek is probably the most widely known Sci-Fi series of all time and there are references to it everywhere. It seems like everyone's dad was a Star Trek fan at some point or another. The reason I considered watching Star Trek was so that I could hopefully catch all of the references to it in shows like The Big Bang Theory. Despite the benefits of finally understanding what the hell Sheldon is talking about when he references the show, I cannot watch it. It is far too boring and I cannot seem to draw my attention to it. Maybe I have too simple a mind but Star Trek bores the fuck outa me.

Clearly I need to stick with television from this generation because that is all that can seem to grab my attention, we've set too high a standard. When looking at prospective series, I must ask myself some serious questions, for instance, "What genre do I want?" Last summer I stuck with comedy and it was great for me. It kept me in a lighthearted mood while I was watching, for the most part, and I was very much entertained. So, a comedy will definitely be one of my selections, but what will the others be? More than one comedy is okay, but I do want some diversity this year. I'm thinking more along the lines of drama or dramedy, although you could argue that Scrubs was a dramedy, which it probably was. So a drama of some sort would definitely be good too.

I have to make my decision very soon and so I have narrowed it down to a couple of choices. For comedies I am considering Archer and How I Met Your Mother, both on recommendation by completely different people. As for a drama, I'm not really sure where to start looking for a good drama. I suppose Breaking Bad is still on my radar but after my dad ruined the third season's recording schedule and I've seen intermittent episodes, my interest has gone downhill. Looking at some of the choices I'm realizing just how broad of a spectrum there is. From the Andy Griffith Show to Numb3rs, there are just too many possibilities. Oh well, I've got instant queue so I'll just watch them all!

Panera

Over the last school year I have wasted an enormous amount of money on fast food and restaurants, however, I am not at the liberty to discuss this absolute figure. Alright what the hell I've spent about seven hundred dollars on food. Yep. That's a whole lot of money and if my parents are reading this now you can assume that I am indefinitely grounded and I may or may not have been sent to Samoa... or wherever the hell Earl from Wolf Gang went, I'm not sure it was supposed to be a joke but screw it now. Okay, I've gotten a bit sidetracked so let's get back on course. Food. It's good. I've spent lots on it. And what I have found, as my pallet has been exposed to a wide range of culinary combinations in various environments, is that Panera has, by far, the best atmosphere and cuisine out of all the chain restaurants.

There are several things that set Panera apart from the crowd and a major component is atmosphere. Compared to all of the sports bars and kitschy or just plain generic restaurants, Panera reigns so far supreme in decor, it's not even funny. When I went to St. Louis over the summer for vacation/a college visit, we saw the original St. Louis Bread Company, the original name for Panera. It so happens that the founder(s) (I'm not really sure how many there were) of Panera came up with the idea for a French-style cafe and bread shop while in France and wanted to bring that concept over to America. What is impressive is that the integrity of their idea has remained in tact over all of the various Paneras that have opened up across the country, including our very own here in Cedar Rapids. The decor inside of Panera includes wooden shutters on the walls that give off the impression that you're actually sitting outside at a French bakery. Works of art hang on the walls, all of which focus on bread as their main focus. All in all it's a damn classy place to have a bagel and a cup of coffee.

Of course, we can't forget the food. It's no five star restaurant but it is still above average. They have a nice selection of soups, sandwiches, and baked goods but the one thing that I would have to say stands above the rest it the hazelnut cream cheese spread. Paired with a cinnamon crunch bagel I would have to say that this is probably one of the better breakfasts that I can think of. I won't try to describe it because I couldn't do a justice to it's majesty. Honestly, just go and try one, you'll see what I mean.

I don't want to romanticize a chain bagel-joint to be more than it is, but for being a chain bagel-joint, I think that Panera is pretty darn good. It has a great atmosphere and a good selection of tasty food that make it a great place to skip school with your best of pals, strictly hypothetically.

Minesweeper

I have a serious problem. It happens ever day. When I'm surfing the web. While I'm watching T.V. When I'm taking a poop. This problem is minesweeper, and I'm addicted to it. It started off a summer ago as nothing more than a game. I was sitting in the guard shack at Elmcrest watching a fellow coworker play through a casual round of expert and I was super impressed. At that point, to me, minesweeper was nothing more than an game with random and arbitrary rules where people luckily clicked around some bombs. Boy how I was wrong. There actually are rules and they make quite a bit of sense. I've since beaten minesweeper on expert multiple times and my PR is between 2-3 minutes. I know, impressive, right? Well, it wouldn't be all that bad if it were just a game that I played at work but this past trimester I found minesweeper as a free MacBook app and downloaded it onto my computer. Since then, I have been consumed by the game. Everything I do on the computer is happening either simultaneously or intermittently with a game of minesweeper. It' gotten to the point that I don't even think about opening up the window anymore, IT JUST HAPPENS. It's become a major distraction to my already struggling my work ethic and I need to stop it.

I've thought about going at this a couple different ways. In one scenario I just accept the fact that I'm hooked and just try to hold on until summer where I can play all the time without it interfering with anything important like, I don't know, school. This doesn't seem like the best option for me because I can only see this problem worsening with further exposure to it. Another idea is to delete the game momentarily and download it again in the summer. A much better compromise that allows me to focus on my studies, or at least on other distractions like Xbox, until the summer. But still, I don't want every waking hour that I'm on my computer to be dominated by some dumb ass number game. In the end, I have decided to delete minesweeper. It's just become more of a pest than anything and I don't even play the game for enjoyment anymore. I figure that it shouldn't be that hard if I just quit cold turkey and get used to immediately not being able to play it. Sure for the first few days I'd always try and open the window and there were times where I considered reinstalling it, but I was able to hold strong, and for that you should be proud of me. Aight, I'm done.

Early Life Crisis

We all have games that define our childhood. For some it may be a sport like basketball that started as an activity and culminated as a varsity championship. For others, it may be a recess game like hopscotch or four square. Well, in the case of myself and several of my friends, that game was Runescape. Being the worlds largest Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game, Runescape captures the essence of the midevil and fantasy in a choppy and low resolution manner. Basically, folks, it was awesome. Coming back to that game now I remember the fun times I had with friends and the many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many hours spent leveling my wood cutting. Now I am faced with a decision crucial to this last trimester of my junior year, my upcoming summer, and, perhaps, my life.

This ever-so-pressing matter at hand is whether or not I should trace back to my roots and start playing Runescape again. I know, this is a tough one. A commitment to an RPG like Runescape is unlike many other games in the sense that it takes such a large time commitment on some of the most monotonous activities you can imagine. To really get the full benefit of the game, you need two things one of which is a membership and the other being stellar stats. In Runescape, there are 25 skills and 99 levels for each skill and 200,000,000 possible experience for each skill. That's a whole lot of time. A whole lot of time to devote to what really comes down to very repetitive clicking patterns. Now, I do have the option of using one of my friend Jon's many high level accounts, but there is something more dignified about keeping with the old Hesho_7 account I created back in 3rd or 4th grade, whenever that was. I've played off and on throughout the years, coming back to it when a friend starts up playing again and quitting when we inevitably loose interest and this resurgence is no different. Jon, Mohammad and I went to Hacienda Las Glorias after an afternoon of playing ultimate frisbee and had a nostalgic conversation about elementary school which inevitably led to one about Runescape. We all vowed to get back on for the end of the school year and into the summer, but I'm not convinced. There's just so much I would like to do this summer and I think that limiting myself to a video game is kind of a waste. Well, it is a waste. As nice as it does sound to spend many mindless hours slaving over the computer in hopes of leveling up my Herblore, I think I'll pass this time around. To be honest, I think I've seen all I need to see from Runescape. Sure, it was a fun game in fourth grade when I had nothing else to do and the levels came quickly, but now it's just so damn time consuming and I want to spend that time in a way that I won't regret. I'm sorry Runescape, but I think it's time for me to pass the Rune Scimmy to the next generation.

Bill O'Reilly IZ DUM

I believe that I have covered this in past blog posts, but I may be one of the greater procrastinators on the planet. During one of my late night procrastipades whilst putting off some chemistry or pre calc assignment, I found myself on YouTube, as I so often do. Somehow, the related video gods on YouTube brought me to a series of clips from the O'Reilly Factor. Now, I've seen enough of Bill O'Reilly in the media and on the Colbert Report and Daily Show on Comedy Central to know that he's a super-conservative and sometimes says some arguable things, however I never really knew the extent of how ludicrous his right-wing views really were until I watched a good half dozen or so of his videos.

After I felt that I had a good understanding of Bill O'Reilly's tactic to argument, I went ahead and posted a tweet that reads as follows: Bill O'Reilly's guide to argument - 1) Fabricate information 2) Cut off opposition mid sentence 3) Get flustered, possibly kick off guest

Perhaps I should elaborate, not only to satisfy the word count but also because I really do have a growing rancor for Bill O'Reilly that needs to be satisfied. First off, how about we discuss the first point of my tweet: fabricated information. It has been noted on numerous occasions that the O'Reilly Factor, really FOX News in general, has fabricated, manipulated, and tweaked information to support their claims, however ambitious. I will leave a few links to back up my claims, as O'Reilly really should do, because I don't want to spend five hundred words illustrating every false accusation that he has made.

Another infamous trait that O'Reilly has that he comes back to time and time again when he hears something that he doesn't like out of his guest's mouth is that he cut them off. Literally in mid-sentence, you will see guests of the O'Reilly Factor get more and more frustrated as Bill repeatedly doesn't allow them to finish their argument. I suppose in theory you have a stronger argument if the other side has an incomplete thesis but when you cut them off yourself it is just plain unprofessional. So, after he cuts them off, Bill likes to morph his position into something that better suits a stance against his opposition. The best I have seen anybody react to this was when John Stewart was debating the criticism that Obama was getting by Fox News for having Common in the White House. When O'Reilly began to speak over him, Stewart simply backed off and made sure that O'Reilly left out his entire debate on the floor. After he did that Stewart was able to trample all over it. By letting Bill think that he has won and getting all he has to say out, Stewart was able to come in, uninterrupted, and deface his argument.

The last thing the O'Reilly does shows more cowardice than either of the first two examples. There have been times where O'Reilly is so defeated that he will either cancel the interview and by making the excuse that he was too upset, which really gets the conservatives all riled up, or he just won't invite a guest on again. Christopher Hitchens was on the O'Reilly Factor and after making Bill look like the little bitch that he is, wasn't invited back. So yeah, I don't like Bill O'Reilly.

Life is Good

Just the other weekend, I drove up to my aunt Kim's house. My grandma was in from Denver and my cousin Brianna was back from UNI. The family went up around 4:00 and left me to drive up on my own after I was done with all the grad parties I had to go to. I get directions to aunt Kim and uncle Gary's house and head up on the highway. The sun is shining and the air is warm so I decide to put on my "old man winter" playlist (the oldies playlist on my iPod). Then I remember two of my favorite summertime songs and set them up in a playlist of their own. If you read the title to this blog you'll know that "Ventura Highway" by America and "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes" by Crosby, Stills & Nash are those two songs. I've linked them as the song titles in that last sentence and I suggest you check them out if you don't already know them so that you will be able to fully appreciate what I am about to discuss.

Back to the story: It's roughly 5:06 on a Saturday evening and I'm headed up I380 towards Center Point to see my family. By now, I have plugged in my iPod and selected the "old man winter" playlist. I then scroll through the song list and see "Ventura Highway." I go back, create a new playlist and add both "Ventura Highway" and "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes" to it. The next twenty or so minutes were absolute bliss. I had never really had a defining point in my life where I had really recognized how great it was to be an American until that day. There are a lot of things wrong with these United States, but freedom is something that has been kept in tact, in some cases improved upon, and something that I can appreciate. In that short drive to Center Point, Iowa, I was more serene than I had ever been. I was content with everything. The music paired with the open road and rolling hills of Iowa was the most beautiful thing I had ever experienced. I saw life for what it was that day, and nothing more. We all are lucky to exist and everyone needs a moment like the one I had to fully appreciate that fact. I know it's silly that a couple of old songs and a drive could invoke such introspective thought but I think that's the point. It's the little things in life that we need to learn to appreciate, as much of a cliche as that already is, it's true.

Hopefully, I can have more of those moments this summer with all of the road trips I aspire to take with all of my friends. Now, it' time for me to go live life. I suggest you do the same.

Sufflemania 1!!!

USHER FUCKING ROCKS. I really don't know why it is that I like Usher so much because he's really not all that different from all the other awful mainstream poppy shit but there is something about that man that just gets me. DJ Got Us Fallin' In Love, minus the Pitbull part, is yet another example of how Usher has kept his relevance and talent over the years. I feel like as long as Usher keeps on making music, I will continue to secretly listen to it in hopes that nobody will find out that I like such an awful artist. Honestly, there is nothing that should make me like Usher, but I am drawn to everything about him. His voice, great dancing, fantastic fashion sense; Usher has swag. Talk about a change of pace, Surfin' Safari by The Beach Boys just came on. I remember listening to The Beach Boys on the big vinyls my aunt still owns after all these years. When I was a kid I would jam out to The Beach Boys all the time but for a period I thought that they were just kiddie and stupid. Now, I appreciate the fun summertime tunes that they have created. Earl Sweatshirt just came on. His music is too angry. I really regret doing this but I think I'll have to skip it. I apologize, I do like Wolf Gang but just not right now, you know how you have to be in a certain mood to listen to some music? Yeah. NEXT. Some more music that Alosha gave me! The Next Time Around by Little Joy, whose drummer is actually Fabrizio from The Strokes, is a good tune. I really haven't had a chance to listen to the lyrics closely but it certainly has a nice melody that makes me happy. And what do you know, The Strokes come on. Probably my favorite band of all time although I don't feel as though I can confidently say that because I'd be alienating a lot of other great bands but still, definitely in my top 3. The song is Last Night and it is a classic from their album Is This Is. I can remember jamming to this with my pals in middle school. Don't you just love when a song brings back a memory? I freaking love nostalgia like that, it just makes me so happy. It's funny how we never fully appreciate how good things are until we hear a song that reminds us how good it was. Last Night is one of those songs for me and I'm glad that it came on TOnight. Yeah, Run DMC came on and I'm not feeling that either. This shuffle session I wasn't really feeling rap. I apologize to those I offended by skipping over the hip hop but it just wasn't me today. Well that's a rap, but before I go, I have hand chosen a song to recommend to all of you. Listen to it cause it's damn good. "All My Friends" - LCD Soundsystem

Discing, Bro

With spring and the air and the snow off the ground, I have started a new outdoor hobby. My friend David had been disc golfing since the past summer with a few of his friends and had really enjoyed it. I had heard of disc golfing previous to my exposure to it this year, in fact, I had even played it at an elementary school birthday party for a friend. I just always thought that it was for creepy shirtless people and stoners. Although I was pretty on point for the most part, I did find that I really enjoyed the "sport" as well and have purchased several discs since.

Disc golfing is a nice kind change of pace activity. It's perfect for lazy days when you still want to be outside and enjoy the sunlight. The wind can be a bitch sometimes, but aside from that it's a pretty stress free game... until you loose a disc. Still, disc golfing is perfect for around 2-5 party members that want to relax and have fun in the company of friends. Discing by yourself has never really appealed to me as being all that fun because it seems like a loner thing to do, but solo discers don't bother me. It's when an entire family reunion takes to the course that I get a little irritated. When there are ten, eleven, up to twenty members in your discing group and many of them have never play the sport the holes are painstakingly slow to play through. I have been held up several times by a large party that can't keep pace and usually I end up skipping holes to speed up the pace.

There are several main courses that I go to here in Cedar Rapids. Clark Park and Shaffer Park are the two that I frequent the most and they both have their differences. Clark Park is an easier course with less foliage and trees. It lays over some hilly terrain but is fairly simple because there are very few obstacles to maneuver. What is lacks in trees, it more than makes up for in wind. Because there is nothing to break the wind, it becomes the most problematic factor in any game that you play at Clark. Still, Clark is a good beginners course that is nice to play around on because you'll seldom get frustrated or loose a disc. Shaffer, on the other hand, is much more terraneous and has tons of trees. It is fairly easy to loose a disc in this course and much more challenging to play. Shaffer also attracts a lot of dirty/drunk people that don't feel the need to wear sufficient clothing, no matter how disgusting their I know that there's a Nascar race.

Ultimate Frisbee

The first time I played ultimate frisbee, or just ultimate for short, was back in freshman year. My good friend Tanner invited me to play with a couple of buddies and because we had nothing better to do, we went to check it out. It's a very competitive and demanding game and if you want to win you'll need to actually apply yourself. We played a lot that summer after freshman year and, being a freshman, I was always one of the youngest there. Regardless, I always found that I would get drafted higher and higher as I proved my value to the team so I was showing signs of improvement. I had a lot of fun that summer but after a lot of the older guys left for college we really didn't play all that much. That is, until this year. This past spring we have started playing again and although my throwing is not yet back up to par, I'm still having tons of fun.

In a nutshell, ultimate frisbee is a passing only football game... only with a frisbee. To explain this better let's use a hypothetical. Image you're playing and you have the frisbee. You have to throw it to one of the other members of your team before the person guarding you, assuming someone is, counts, or stalls, you to ten. If you either throw an incompletion, an interception, or don't throw it in time possession changes and you are on defense. Defense is pretty self explanatory but there are some more advanced techniques that help you become a better defender. On offense though, you're biggest objective is to get open. By faking out or loosing your man you can attempt to find some open space on the field so that your team can move down the field and hopefully score. We typically play games to seven with five people on each team but depending on personel and how everybody is feeling we can adjust the length of the game.

Now that it's junior year and we've started up playing again I can tell that I've gotten better or just more athletic. My defensive skills are pretty up to par but I think that's just because I'm one of the only people who try to defend. I'm exited to keep playing through the summer because a lot of my friends play and if we can get consistant turn outs it should be a fun way to get some exercise.

Jack Johnosn

Let us talk about Jack Johnson. What a guy. He's just sooooo good. All of his music I like. All of it. I know that people say that it's all the same and that is some kind of stereotype for douche bag, college-age "bros" to like Jack Johnson but I guess I have something in common with the bros because I freaking love Jack Johnson. It's just that all of his music is so, and now I'm sounding more like a bro so please excuse me, chill. Yea, some of it's up beat but a high tempo song for Jack Johnson is like a lullaby comparatively to any other artist. I feel like he and I would get along really well. He seems like the kind of guy that would have a very laid back and peaceful approach to life. I think his philosophy might be something that a lot of people could benefit from listening to and living by. Now I'm just speculating about random things, but still I would like to meet this man. What else can we discuss about Jack Johnson. I suppose there is still some potential left in talking about his music so let's go back to that. I'll talk about a few songs and we can see where that takes us. Mediocre Bad Guys is a really great example of a more up tempo Jack Johnson song. It has really nice guitar and percussion that carry it and the lyricism is fantastic. It's another one of those songs where Jack's female companion isn't treating him right and things aren't working out. This is actually something I'd like more to talk about. It's always really weird for me to think about musicians having a love life that they're singing about. I guess it really shouldn't be that foreign of a concept but it's still kind of abstract for me to imagine. Like, who are the girls that Jack Johnson would date? Damn. I just realized that he's not necessarily young and is probably married. When I looked it up on Wikipedia it turned out that he was and has been since 2000. Apparently he married his college sweetheart, Kim. But that's a nicer thought that him dating around, I guess. Oooh, and as I'm now listening to his music shuffle on iTunes the song Little Girl came on. It's such a cute, romantic little tune. Awww. Now I feel lonely. Wow, I've gone through a lot in this one blog. I need to take a little time off, maybe reflect and listen to some JJ. I hope thats an acronym for Jack Johnson that's commonly used or else I look like a moron. But really this is turning into a piece of shit and it's late. Sorry, Ayers, for the shitty post. It won't happen again.

Gibbs Dibbs

Everybody has their own little things they do that make them who they are. Idiosyncrasies, if you will. For instance, if you watch the show Everybody Loves Raymond you'll notice that Raymond's brother, Robert, touches the food on his fork to his chin before each bite. While most people have a few of these strange little habits, I know someone that is quite different in this respect. He IS an idiosyncrasy. This man, ladies and gentleman, is Lucas Ray Gibbs.

Luke Gibbs, or just Gibbs as we so affectionately call him, is by far one of the most interesting people that I have ever met. Born in Independence, Iowa on January 2nd, 1995, Gibbs grew up in the rolling hills and cornfields of small town Iowa. Although familiar with farm life and seemingly fond of the countryside, Gibbs has grander plans for his life journey. A brilliant, although occasionally chaotic and cluttered, mind, he has his sights set on high calibur schools like Stanford and big city dreams. In fact, he has made the generous offer of extending me an invitation to fly out to "The Farm" over the summer for a college visit. A peculiar and somewhat random invitation, perhaps, but this, folks, is why Gibbs is Gibbs.

Enough of this family history bullshit, let's really talk about Gibbs. Aside from having the same name as the black guy in the new TBS show Men at Work, Gibbs is very much an individual. There are a lot of things about him that, at the same time, impress and scare me. He has such an alternative view on things that is at times difficult to understand yet admirable. But it is not how Gibbs thinks that entertains me the most, but it is the things that he does.

Here's a nice textbook Gibbs story for you all, one that's fresh in my mind because lord knows there is no way in hell that anybody could remember every story that boy has told. The more I think about it now, this is less of a story and more of an occurrence in Gibbs' life. Of course, you could argue what is any story but an occurrence but what I mean is that it really isn't that atypical of his experiences, but that is aside the point. Basically all that happened was that one night, while up late in his apartment, Gibbs decided that he had nothing better to do but go to Perkins at 1 AM. While at Perkins Gibbs' discovers that an entire pot of coffee costs not a penny more than $2.29. So, like any rational mind would do, Gibbs decides to purchase said pot of coffee, along with some breakfast, and sits at Perkins for a number of hours playing a Harvest Moon-esque 90's computer game until he has to go to school.

Some think he's crazy, and I'm still on the fence about whether or not I am in that group, but what is certain is that Gibbs is unique. He certainly makes life more interesting by the things that he does, and does with frequency, and I thank him for that.

#FirstWorldProblems

America's biggest problem is that we don't have any. Okay maybe we have a few, but the citizens aren't complaining about the struggling economy or our foreign policy nearly as much as they complain about just plain stupid shit. For instance, there is a girl in a couple of my classes that does nothing but gossip. She is the epitome of an attention whore and can't seem to shut up for more than thirty seconds about all the shit that Jenny was talking and how boys don't treat her like a fucking princess. I just get so sick and tired of hearing all this bullshit day in and day out that I've decided to make my very own post about it. American's are the worlds worst complainers and now we have nothing better to whine about so we have made up our own first world problems.

Let's define some key terms. First off, first world problems are not things that anyone should be talking about ever. They hold no precedence or relevance in any conversation and yet become the topic of many among our fine citizens today. A first world problem is far lower in severity to a third world problem and many of them are either A) not problems or B) small inconveniences that could be easily dealt with. For example, people always like to complain about driving. "Oh my god you would not believe the traffic! I must have hit every red light on the way over!!!" Really. That's it? You were maybe five minutes delayed from what your ideal arrival time would have been and now this is the topic of conversation? What I like to do to combat morons that insist on burdening me with their first world problems is put things in perspective. It's a really good way to shut them up. Had to stay up all night finishing your homework? At least you don't have AIDS. You see, AIDS is a real and pressing third world problem that needs serious attention. When you bring that shit up, you'd be surprised how quickly our first world friends shut up. 

I like to give credit where credit is due and so for this blog post I was inspired by comedian Louis C.K. He is a very funny man and I suggest you check out some of his work. You can find video of his act posted on YouTube. The clip that I am linking to, however, is an interview done on the Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien (or just plain Conan, I forget which). Anywho, it's pretty entertaining, enjoy!

Sorry, I had to add in that some girl in front of me just said, "God, I haven't had Twitter or Instagram for a day... Isn't that so annoying??" What a maroon.

Facebook is for FOOOOLS

I haven't had a Facebook for about six months now. And it's great. I know that Andrew and Henna would like to take credit for me deleting my account but I can truly only give them partial credit. What happened was that Andrew was finding his Facebook to be too distracting and his grades weren't great so he deleted it. Henna then jumped right on that bandwagon and deleted hers too. I had been drifting apart from Facebook for some time because I felt that it was becoming too complicated. There were too many damn changes and things kept on becoming more and more unnecessarily... complicated. So when I saw Andrew delete his Facebook, it gave me the strength to delete mine, and for that I thank him. Basically Henna had no part in me deleting my Facebook account. Yeah, fuck you Henna. You heard.

Anyway, let's talk about the implications of a Facebook free lifestyle. Deleting Facebook today is like moving out to Walden pond. You're disconnected from the world and, you know what, it's kind of nice. I'm not always checking Facebook every ten minutes while I do my homework. Honestly the only thing that I might miss about Facebook is chatting with friends but why talk with people online when you can talk to them in person?? You see, I'm a huge fan of the whole transcendentalist thought movement. You probably noticed my Walden reference (look at me! I know famous literary works!) but I actually do have a huge respect for his dedication to transcendentalism. I wish that I had the balls to completely remove myself from society but a lot of teenagers tried that in the 60's and it really led to nowhere so I'll pass. As for my Facebook experiment, I'm enjoying it quite a lot. I'm starting to actually cut back in other sorts of electronic means like texting and video game playing as well. I don't know whether it's good or bad that I'm falling out with all of these technologies but I still know how to use them just the same so up to this point it hasn't made that much of a difference to me. It feels so free not having to check all of that bullshit all of the time. I plan on carrying this behavior over into the summer becuase my goals for this summer are to mainly spend a lot of time outside and with my friends. If I'm having face-to-face conversations and interactions all the time, why the hell would I need an Asspamphlet (see what I did there? Eh?).

So that's pretty much how I feel about the matter. Less digital interactions means more time spent doing things in real life so I'm not sure why anybody would rather spend their time inside on the computer rather than out doin' some real life shit!

The Great Marketing Campaign of the 21st Century

Recently I logged onto Twitter from our miserable laptops here at school to find some inspiration for a blog topic. I was just about to hit "Enter" and it was then that it caught my eye. Now, I am no Twitter newbie as I've amassed hundreds of tweets and logged in many times, but it was only in this instant that I truly took into account the websites homepage. I believe that some time ago, perhaps months, Twitter changed its homepage from the bright sky blue tweety birds to a more modern and "hip" layout. What I didn't realize until now was the picture they chose to represent their franchise. Something to capture the essence of our modern internet age of instant access and social media. What the marketing wizards at Twitter so ingeniously decided on was the image of four Indian men, presumably in their late 20s early 30s, playing a game of cricket outside in a field with the silhouette of a mosque dissolving into the sunset.

Now, I understand the purpose that this was intended to serve, representative of a global online community and how Twitter is a great big international company, but really? Basically their marketing scheme encompasses using completely random photos of humble photos of citizens from across the globe, whether they be farmers harvesting in a Chinese rice patty, young Brazilian children playing soccer in an abandoned field, or the young men of India out to get some exercise in the waining moments of sunlight before iftar can be held. But honestly, how far can they take this?? At a certain point, I feel that this technique absolutely looses all effectiveness and becomes random and seemingly arbitrary. Also, another question that was raised in my mind when I saw this picture was why the hell was it taken? Was it captured specifically for the purpose of Twitter's homepage or did one of these Indian men just happen to have a high-resolution, professional camera and say, "Hey, this would make a great photo shoot!"????

I don't think we'll ever find out, but regardless, this whole thing is just silly. Honestly, the more I've thought about it, the more I start to actually like it. I mean, it's kind of funny. Now, instead of criticizing the stupidity of these attempts to somehow identify *insert company name here* with a global community, I actually find myself entertained by how obscure these pictures become.

Big Ol' Crazy Concepts

I have a lot of time to think to myself during the course of a day. Sometimes I maybe should be listening to other people, but clearly I’m far more interesting. Throughout my sporadic thoughts wander many, many questions. Some, I think, are pretty good. Why don’t l raise a few right now?

What occurs to me as incredibly interesting is the fact that all of our conscious, and unconscious, thought is completely driven by electrical impulses. When you really think about it, it’s pretty astonishing. All of our emotions what we hold so personal and central to the human experience are nothing more than the triggering of a multitude of tiny neurons. It is mind boggling to think about all of the wonders of our mind, but what this got me wondering about is if there is anything more to our brains than what we already know about white and grey matter and etc. Of course I don’t know everything about neuroscience and the biology of the mind but I feel that I have a pretty good understanding, at least enough to make this inquiry. Part of me truly thinks that there may be something more to our minds, maybe there’s a spiritual element to our thought, but more or less I am simply dumbfounded by the idea that all of our thoughts are, basically, electrical impulses. It honestly just seems impossible. I guess that’s one of the failures of our great minds, the incapability to grasp certain concepts, which, conveniently, is my next fascination.

Our minds are incredible structures. Humans, by far, are the most intelligent beings, as we know. But we will never be able to grasp concepts like infinity. Our earth is billions of years old. Maybe it’s a bold statement to say that nobody can completely understand just how long that is but I am positive that I can’t. We live relatively short lives. Extremely short lives compared to the infinite amount of time that has and will continue to exist. Gee what a coincidence! I was just going about to talk about time, see the next paragraph for more on this intriguing subject.

Time is yet another concept that people have created for themselves to solidify an abstract concept. What is incredible about time is that it could have really never “began.” For something to begin there has to have been something, some period before it that supersedes its existence. In the instance of time, there can’t have been anything that happened before it. It is the ultimate measure; the one thing that we know to always remain constant and yet has there or will there ever be a time without time?? Also, on the topic of abstract topics, let’s discuss space. Like all of it. And the big bang. I have never read anything on it but let’s be honest, the big bang theory just sounds like a bit of a stretch.

That is unfortunately all I can retract from my brain at the moment, but I assure you Dr. Ayers, assuming you are the only person following my blog, that there will be more things in this category for me to blog about in the future. Goodbye, mortals.

The Carlton

Music is a great thing. It's crazy how it can change your mood almost instantly. One moment you may be drowsy and apathetic while you write your essay and, out of nowhere, your iTunes shuffles to some Hall & Oates. Immediately, you feel energized and snap out of this miserable mood. For a moment, you quit writing and just start singing along with You Make My Dreams Come True and in that moment nothing else matters. All inhibitions disappear as you begin dancing in your seat, swaying from side to side, snapping and smiling all of the way as the music continues to blare. Perhaps this can solidify the picture in your mind:

You keep this up until the end of the song, although Carlton was unfortunately cut off, and iTunes shuffles along to some distorted, perverted Odd Future song and the mood is gone. You go back to work where you left off writing your essay.

All-State Part 3: Closing Ceremonies

It was finally time for us to go out and perform. I felt that we were ready, but we needed a good draw. Before I knew it, the room chair had ushered us over and we were drawing our situations. I didn't fuddle around at all with the small slips of paper, I distinctively chose one. Before even I could read it Shane decided that my situation would be our performance.

"You drank too much coffee." That was what we had to work with. Immediately, Andrew suggested that Shane be a man who comes into a coffee shop and, successively over the period of three days, becomes more and more addicted until he is hooked and jittery. We agree that Andrew will be a barista and I a snobby, coffee shop, hipster writer. I then say that we should have an intervention for him after the third day. We decide that I would change characters to a doctor who can help Shane we would use breathing exercises and shock therapy to snap Shane back into normality. Just wait, it gets better. Finally, the ending we came up with involved Shane coming in 6 months later and Andrew asking, "Oh, so are you off coffee now?" and Shane responding, "Nope, just decaf!" Hilarious. I know.

The improv went over great. The crowd loved it and and was fun to perform. The best feeling, throughout the day, wasn't the compliments that we got from friends or relatives, but the random compliments throughout the hallways. It really gave a lot of confidence going into the closing ceremonies that we got so many "warm fuzzies" during the course of the day.

I'm just going to skip the rest of the day until the closing ceremonies, aside from one notable performance I'd like to mention. I can't remember the name exactly but a good friend of mine from Fairfield was in one of the most beautiful group mimes I've ever seen. Now, it should be said that I haven't seen many group mimes but his was so much different from anything I've seen. All of their movements were interchanging and inventive and the whole performance had a flow and rhythm to it like no other. It was incredible.

Let's not waste anymore time with gibber jabber, and get to right to the point of this blog series. The closing ceremonies had finally arrived and I was very anxious. Andrew was up on stage with the banner, as were all of last years winners, I was in the crowd, yet Shane, unfortunately, could not be there with us due to a show choir competition. Then they did the most awful thing they could have ever done while we were awaiting the announcement of the banners. They individually announced every group from every school that made it to All-State and handed out medals. With around one hundred schools and an even more vast number of groups that made it, performing and non-performing, this part of the evening easily consumed twenty minutes. All the while I was tensed in my chair, my stomach in a knot just waiting for them to begin calling the banners.

After all the heart-wrenching waiting, they finally began. With each banner that was called came a roar of applause from the crowd and a standing ovation by the two hard-core speech schools, which I can't remember their names. The winning group and school would then jump up, all exited to have won, giving hugs around and screaming, some crying, in joy. Then, after approximately eight of these celebrations, the improv judge was called to the podium. I swear, while he was giving the introduction to his decision, time froze. I forgot about the massive auditorium around me and the thousands of people in it. As he made a comment about making sure he got the right name, my heart skipped a beat (Kennedy sent two improv groups to All-State). And, finally, he called it. "Our winner this year for improvisational acting goes to.... Group Hanzelka from Cedar Rapids Kennedy!" The entire place went into an uproar once again as I leaped from out of my seat, running straight to Mrs. Osborn for a celebratory embrace. She was so exited it felt as though for a moment that she was going to bring me onto stage with her. She ran up onstage where Andrew was freaking out next to the banner himself and they too shared a moment.

From there, the rest is history. I impatiently waited for the last few events to be called so that I could race up to stage and bask in the glory of our prize. When the ceremonies were over I ran up to Andrew and Mrs. Osborn and we all hugged and it was glorious. From there, the texting and calling of relatives and friends alike began. We were told that Shane was freaking out at his show choir competition and Henna announced the good news to everyone that could hear her. The smile that first appeared on my face from the moment our banner was called didn't leave me for quite some time, and the joy that it brought me still hasn't. Not only was that one of the happiest days of my life, but I gained and learned a lot from it. The most important thing that I took from it was to always be happy. That banner gave me so much joy and I probably had so many endorphins rushing around inside of me that I thought to myself, "Why can't I always be this happy?" Obviously I probably can't maintain this kind of high, but I can always try.

Also, suck it Roberta.

All-State Part 2: Building Suspense!

After making awkward conversation with Tyler and discussing whatever random factoids Gibbs had to offer, our shuttle finally arrived. We all unloaded our things from the bus and hopped on a crammed, little space for the next thirty or so minutes. Although there wasn't much room, that isn't to say that it wasn't a fun ride. Tyler did a good job of confusing the shit out of our driver and his assistant. By talking about a hypothetical chainsaw-bottle-opener he completely lost them in conversation leaving both distraught by the end of the ride.

When we finally arrived in Ames I rushed immediately to the main building in hopes of seeing Assassins, the musical theatre group that left us behind, but I was only able to catch the last three notes of their performance on a projector screen. Now, it was time to start gearing up for improv; the whole reason I was there. I won't get into any of the technical details of my wardrobe change other than where it took place. The only thing I want to say about this is that the bathrooms at ISU are actually pretty amazing. I don't know if this some form of treason saying as I'm an Iowa fan but honestly, they were great. The doors were two-parted swinging doors like what you would see in a western film and once you got into the stall the toilet was like three feet high, my feet were barely touching the ground. Other than that they had some weird looking urinals and the rest was pretty ordinary but I though the stalls were awesome nonetheless.

Lets skip ahead a few hours, about thirty minutes before we performed. We found a warm up room shared by what looked to be a musical theatre group. As usual we planned a few improvs that all seemed to bear some potential. I knew that today our key to success was to make Shane our star. I know that he's a very modest guy, but he is also easily the rock of our group. There's just something about him, whether it be his innocence, wacky-ness or just overall likability the crowd just eats up everything he throws out.

Right before we walked into the room where our crowd and judge would watch us perform, we snuck into an empty warm-up room and had a moment. I cannot discuss what happened there in the 5-10 minutes before our performance but I might add that it was a very special bonding time that solidified our team work and was the driving factor behind our improv.

-see next post for the improv of your lives!!

All-State Part 1: The Bus from Hell

This weekend, Shane Neilson, Andrew Hanzelka and I won the All-State Speech banner for Improvisational Acting. It was great. I will describe the glorious day.

Early in the morning I awoke as always on the dawns of speech competitions. But this day was different. Today was the last group speech competition of the year. It was the pinnacle of Iowa speech; it was All-State. Unfortunately my one act play, which had all the potential to get there, had fallen flat at state but somehow did make non-performing. Although I was bummed about that, I was still performing in improv and that was what mattered to me. You see, Shane, Andrew and Chase had won the year before and now it was up to us to bring the banner back to Kennedy by the end of the day. Any who, I got ready and drove to the horseshoe at Kennedy where we would board the bus. 

Once on the road, I conversed some with Tanner and Shane, making pleasant conversation and joking around. We then all proceeded to take a roughly forty-five minute nap. When we awoke there was some commotion at the front of the bus where Diane was talking in a panicked tone with our bus driver. Apparently we had taken a misguided route and were redirecting for Ames, where the whole competition would be taking place. It was unfortunate and we were on schedule to miss the opening ceremonies now, but we all shrugged it off an went back to talking. After another fifteen minutes or so of driving and nezzling with Shane, I heard a sound like compressed air was being released and the bus had started to slow. We stopped at the side of the road with a busted radiator. It looked like our day was going to become a little more complicated yet.

See, because our drama department apparently gets zero funding Kennedy was the only school to drive up the morning of and not stay the night before. So we pulled over to a nearby Kum & Go, which I still believe to be a provocative name. After frantically arranging rides somebodies dad came and rescued our musical theatre group in an H3 Hummer so that they could perform on time. The rest of us, however, had to wait. And wait. And wait. BAH BAH BAAHHHHHH!!!!

-see the next entry for more juicy details!

Frosting Fridays

Recently, a new event has been brought to my knowledge. Another arbitrary day of celebration to mark on our calendars. This is not an annual, nor biannual, nor monthly occurrence but once every week there will be a day of rejoice. I feel like these kinds of things are too few and far between and that is why I was so overjoyed when I got the news of "Frosting Fridays." In a nut shell, what happens is you buy a small tub of frosting and a pack of animal crackers and, throughout the day, eat them in all of your classes. You're free to share, in fact, sharing is recommended, even encouraged! Such a simple thing, and yet so wonderful.

I have to give credit where credit is due so I would like to accredit Jonathan Ling with the distinction of being the man who introduced me to this glorious end of the work week celebration. And to go even further back in the books, Jon told me that a friend of his, from a school I am currently forgetting, who has since graduated and is currently attending college was the originator of this great day. So, thank you, random college sophomore, for enlightening us all.

Although I have not personally fully committed myself to a Frosting Friday, due to forgetfulness, I have been offered me some frosting covered animal crackers by none other than Jon Ling and they were delightful. I have high hopes for this day that I will hopefully be participating in sometime in the near future, but for now I would like to discuss days like this in general. If you don't know what I mean by that, then you're dumb. Just kidding, I got kind of tired and really lazy there so I just sort of typed the first thing that came to mind. Well, enough of this inner monologue to help put words down onto the screen and let's get down to brass tax. Damn it, did it again. But for real, there are far too few fun days like Frosting Fridays. I suppose it is because we can't have too many, or really more than probably two a week, or it'd just be over kill. But still, I never hear of these fun weekly or monthly, whatever period of time-ly occurrences nearly enough. I would like to hear of these fun occurrences more often so get cracking on it world, come up with some fun days to brighten everybody's lives.